Quote:
Originally Posted by Jaybird57
I believe that silence in counseling can be very effective in helping to give us time to process and think about what is going on inside our heads. But I also believe that it can be very isolating and abandoning if it isn't used in a way that is very individualized. Some of us find the silence as painful. A good therapist learns what is effective and helpful for each individual person. If it is unhelpful or isolating, our therapists need to learn this through their interactions with us; she sensed on a gut level whether or not the silence is unhelpful. If it closes us down or makes us withdraw, than a silence is not a good technique for us as an individual. A good skilled therapist will recognize the difference. Personally, I think this comes with experience and intuitive understanding.
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Nice post
I also wanted to add that silences are another topic to talk to your T about.
I like them. I'm a slow thinker and responder, so it feels more natural to me. And I like being given room, not being 'hurried'.
So when T and I talked about silences, I learned that she doesn't feel the same way that I do (how dare her??!!! lol), but she respects my wishes and jumps in less frequently. If she senses me pulling away vs. thinking and looking for words, she will not let it go on too long. I appreciate that because I can get very stuck in the silence, and of course it's reassuring to know that she knows me well
