thanks for responding Sannah and broken cloud I'm feeling better today.

My family definitely has never been able to deal with emotional issues at all. They aren't able to handle most things. They won't talk about my difficulties at all. I have an older sister who was severely injured in an accident and wasn't supposed to live. She has had one health issue after another since the accident. My parents won't talk about it. My mother wouldn't even go to the hospital when it happened and they didn't expect my sister to survive. She said she had to go to work the next day.

I live a good distance away from them, so that's good. I am also in the process of looking at disability, but it won't be enough to cover my bills. I am going to try to overlook things/ignore (my parents) for a while until I feel ready to find a job. I don't want to lose my home mostly because of my daughter and my animals.

Hopefully, I'll be able to go back to work when my medical leave is up. I can't fathom it honestly, but maybe things will change.

Also, I'm just dealing with one day as it comes along and trying to make it through for now.

For today, I am not suicidal and do not feel the need to cut.