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Mar 11, 2012, 02:09 PM
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Member Since: Dec 2003
Posts: 826
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sannah
Talking about it, getting it outside of yourself.
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I agree but this isn't always possible. It is hard to describe without it sounding like an excuse but when I'm angry at myself I am quite easily triggered into anger at other people over things that normally would not irritate me at all. I don't like being near people when I'm angry, not only because I lash out, but also because if they are kind to me I feel as though I have to be grateful and thankful and nice and that frustrates me further....and also I tend to project my self-hatred outwards at times so I have a stong aversion to being near people.
However I will continue talk to my therapist more about the self hatred. Thank you.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Callmebj
Your self hatred sounds pretty unhealthy as it sounds as though you are buying into guilt that you should not have. I hope that you are getting professional help from someone on addressing this.
I feel when I take good care of myself with eating right and
vitamins and stuff, that I feed the child inside and that makes me feel better about things.
Anger I believe is considered the flip side of fear. There are ways to keep oneself more level about these issues. Therapy is a good source when dealing with anger
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I would say my self hatred is unhealthy in that I would probably be able to do a lot more with my life if I was more self-accepting. I know it holds me back in friendships and general socialisation and even irritates friends at times.
These are not feelings generated from abuse but I agree when I am doing the right things like exercise and eating healthy I do feel a lot better about myself. It is interesting how twisted my mind can get in that I can logically know the things that make me feel healthier and yet want to do the complete opposite. It takes a heck of a lot of will power to do the 'right' thing!
It is highly likely that my anger is a cover up for my anxiety. Anxiety I don't feel I should have which is why I become angry at myself. This whole self acceptance concept is seriously beyond me, I think today after doing some thinking about it all I'm realising a big part of me is willing to try something new as self-berating isn't exactly working(!) but another huge part of me is terrified of feeling the feelings underneath the anger which I think is a massive amount of shame and guilt.
Thank you very much for your reply.
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