What I discovered is that the alters who wanted (needed) to act out the abuse did so because I was not yet willing or able to handle processing through the trauma memories. It was their way of forcing me to confront the actual abuse. The pain was there and was real, but I was not hearing the pain. I was able to accept the facts of what happened to me, but I was not able to accept the pain that those alters held for me.

Once I opened myself up and allowed myself to fully feel the pain/shame/humilation/agony/sorrow/fear that an alter was holding as a result of them being the "one" who enduring a specific horror, that freed the alter. That alter no longer had to contain all of those emotions by themselves.

After doing that, their "need" to act out the trauma was greatly reduced.