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Originally Posted by IceCreamKid
Maybe I can help you a little bit and there are others who can add their ideas, too. Insurance is confusing, but if you are insured, then there is usually a toll-free number on the back of your insurance card that you can call with questions, for example "I would like to know if psychological counseling is covered by my policy and what the copay would be." You may still be insured through your parents. If you have no insurance, you can look for a place that offers low cost or sliding scale fees. About college: many, many people go to college not sure of what they want for a major. Many change their majors one or more times before graduation. College should be a time of academic exploration as well as concentration. If you are interested in computers, that is enough to start taking your first class, which might be something like "Introduction to Computers." If you want to meet people, including a potential girlfriend, you can get involved in volunteer activities. Courage!
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I know the number you speak of, however I will have to somehow muster up the courage to call it. Some companies like to get
technical and use terminology that tends to fly over my head. As for volunteering, I don't know.. I'm just not a volunteering type of person. If anything, I need people volunteering to help me. At this point in my life, I just don't have the heart to help, not when I can't help myself.
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Originally Posted by Leed
Hi ~ Bless your heart, you're totally overwhelmed, and I understand. There was a time I felt just like you.
Before you even consider college, you need to see a therapist. Just like "Icecreamkid" said, if you have insurance call the toll free number on the back of your insurance card, and speak with someone about what coverage you have. Ask them if you have mental health coverage, and if you do, ask them how much you have and what the copayments are. Then ask them what participating doctors you can go to. They will give you a list of doctors in your area that you can see -- then you can call one of them for an appointment. 
Therapy is the best idea for you. They will help you increase you self-esteem -- to get it back. For some reason, you don't have much. They'll help you with your shyness, and any other problems. Believe me, I've been thru therapy and it's WONDERFUL!! It really does make a huge difference in your life, if you get a good therapist! If you find that one therapist isn't quite right for you, you can always switch to another. But don't give up on therapy.
I wish you the very best. It's a grand life out there, and it WILL be for you too!  God bless you and take care. Hugs, Lee
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You're right, my self-esteem is pretty shot, however there are times where I feel great and my self-esteem is really high. And while a therapist is an idea worth looking into, I have trouble speaking to strangers when they will only do it for money. I need hour(s), not just an hour, to get things off my chest.
What I really feel I need, is a friend. I've never had more than 2 friends in my life at a time. The people I have befriended have always taken advantage of me, have moved on, or have found better things to do. Not only does time do a lot to my relationships, I also have interests that some people don't really see eye-to-eye with me on; I like japanese music, I love to watch old movies, and I prefer relaxing at home over going out and doing things in public. I like to be out in public, doing normal people things like shopping, just.. not every single week.