I know my H never really understood what the relationship was like for me or what it meant (or some of my friends either, esp. the one who goes to church with T#1)......he doesn't understand now why there still sort of a grief process over the T who terminated me, what, 7 months ago now, or why it was so hard for me recently when she backed out of a closure visit that she had initially seemed willing for when my 2nd T tried to set it up....I don't like that there is still an odd feeling of loss/grief over the whole thing. It was just such an intense, odd, powerful relationship......so good for many months, so rich, but also so hard, so painful, and the ending so strange......I can't even yet completely understand or explain the relationship to myself, much less to anyone else, why she meant so much to me and still does even though it hurt so much!
Now, my 2nd T experience was/is just a lot more straightforward and uncomplicated and easy to understand......she is important to me, but it's not so intense...the relationship and my feelings about it are a lot more definable....