I guess this is also where alot of my problem stems from 'cause actually......i don't want to get a divorce......but also don't really know if we could get to a point where we are on the same page sexuality again. There's not much chance he would go to therapy with me. Difficult position. We were compatible at the beginning, but our sexual appetites have diverged in these last 4 years. It is completely against my moral code to have an affair so I strongly believe that's out of the question.......except that does leave me rather unfulfilled. I am really wanting to explore with my T how this relates to my views/attitudes to sex regarding my experience with csa. And see what goes from there. I do agree with Dr skipper about everyone deserving to be with someone who can sexuality satisfy them, but I also agree with the others regarding working on your marriage.