Quote:
Originally Posted by hankster
before I moved out, I told my mother if she could go for one day without insulting me, I would stay. After two hours, she looked like her head was going to explode, she couldn't hold it in any longer! Then I told her if she would apologize, I would stay. She refused to apologize. I finally took the hint. 
ETA: MKAC - it's not possible! they can't change. we have a life sentence as their children. |
Sometimes they can change, if they will obtain something they want badly enough for better behavior. After my kids were a few years old, I told my Mom I was through with her behavior and if she didn't treat me civilly, she would no longer be allowed to see her grandchildren. I told her she didn't have to act nice, just be civil. Am happy to report she shaped up IMMEDIATELY.
Wish I'd had this leverage much earlier in my life. While I am glad she was able to change her behavior, it kind of made me mad too. All along, it was in her control to act better and not treat me like crap. It wasn't just some "way she was" that we had to excuse her for. It turned out, when she wanted to, she could stop the sh*tty behavior.
Granite, I share that info because maybe your father can treat you better if you tell him to, really lay down an ultimatum. Even just "I won't help you anymore if you treat me this way" might at least get you out of these painful helping sessions. He could either stop being awful or you would stop helping. Either way, it would be better.
