((Rose)) Thank you for your kind words
And LadyTammie thanks too- Yeah I realize more can be to a dx, than just the primary one- shocked when they put "severe" PTSD on me too, but I accept that one more than the Bipolar some days.. i am odd though

Rose-
Yeah, this was about a month ago that this whole stuff was going on badly and the T thing... I still at times am bouncing with the paranoia stuff- but maybe that was a norm and I just did not realize it and it was worse at the time of this thread starting- I was told first went into therapy August 2011- it was not paranoia but a trust issue .. and the Therapist agreed paranoia this Feb 2012...... but whatever, I just wanted ways to cope with it.

At some points I can step out side of my head, It is always a good thing to do .. Other times not so well.. but it does happen eventually- Some times talks with my boyfriend help with getting out of thoughts.

I have to wonder too-- 01/30/12 I stopped taking the meds cold turkey as suggested by the T and Pdoc, and 02/10/12 is two weeks-- if perhaps it was still effects. The Lamictal for me was just bad, and they just had me on that with nothing else-- I know the T said that I sounded manic at points on the Lamictal .. unfortunately my Pdoc appointment was after the T thing on 02/13 and I sort of flipped out and just cancelled the Pdoc appt as well that was going to be on the 17th of Feb.... Sorry if that was a bad move but I just at this point was tired and felt hopeless still of getting help needed.... The Anti-psychotics scare me some times, i have done enough damage to my brain.... but then again when I was on the Lamictal i think if I saw the Pdoc while on it, that I would had went on anti-psychotics for I was pushing for that with my boyfriend though I am against it in "regular land of Beauflow" for the most part

As far as Past wounds- yes and maybe no-- I try to push through things from the past, realize that maybe why Hurt on some subjects is due to it brings up things from the past for me, and so on... Maybe they are resolved and maybe they are not truly ever closed, but I am not sure...

But ya know I am 25, I have realized for a while now that I have had issues (weather big or small), and I think even with out therapy (or if one day with therapy again)- I work on these things since I am a little introspective/self aware sort of things and am trying to be better.
I think the last T liked that but then did not like that about me.... but oh well.

This March month has been ok- still bouncing around a little but it is ok..

The strange thing with all of this that even though it was really bad in January and February-- there were some good things too-- Even IF i was manic, with staring my little side shop of crafts and paintings and arts--- It is good- for a I have stuck to it and have continued to create....

Maybe another time in my life I will try therapy again-not sure... I want to get back into school this year-- and work is stressful now, which could be a contributor.

Thanks all again- sorry for the babble