Is wishing you could go to sleep and never wake up classified as a "suicidal thought"? I have no intention of actually killing myself but I would be so relieved if I just randomly dropped dead; it would be such a relief. The only reason I don't want to kill myself is because of friends/family. If I didn't have them nothing would stop me. I am just living my life for other people and that is a miserable way to be. I can't do it anymore.