What is with this dichotomy? It's in my head X it's an illness. It is not that simple.

To be honest, it bothers me this condition (which is very serious one) is called "disorder". It is a reaction to extreme situation. Why call the sufferer "disordered" for developing a reaction? Or even ill?

It is something one has to deal with, it can be extremelly hard... but I don't see it as illness per se. It's humane reaction to often inhumane things.