Thanks for your message likewater....you are so funny!!!! I don't know why I'm turned on by the things I am, but some people say that kink/fetish is more akin to a sexual orientation...... Not just an experimentation. I wonder if that's true. My partner views masterbation, and using any toys as 'cheating'. Anything that does not involve him.....he considers as being chosen over him. Whenever I find the need to /decide to do these things I have to be very careful to hide any and all evidence that I have done this or he is very very angry! He has already told me that he would rather divorce than go to therapy.
He has more or less told me that I have to get over my fetishes, stop using any toys, start having sex with him, and start communicating to him everything that is in my head (even though he often doesn't want to hear it) or else get a divorce! Yikes! I don't know what to do 'cause without him I don't know if I have what it takes to survive!!!