That guy of yours sounds like the best thing that ever came into your life. Oh, at times, you probably feel fed up with him and think he doesn't really understand how you feel. Well - gals who tell me all the time how their guy is "just the best" and how they feel totally understood and wouldn't change a thing about this paragon of virtue . . . well, they are likely living in La-la land and headed for a deep plunge into an unkind reality.

Regarding what is good for you, it is possible that what you say and what your boyfriend says are BOTH correct. When you talk about "keeping busy," you are not indicating a mindset where you are just flitting around. Doing things that are meaningful for you, and that allow you to be productive, is not "busy work." That's how humans are meant to behave, especially at your age. Much later in life, it becomes natural to spend more time in the recliner following the news on TV and more time just sitting outside and just watching what's going on. Your boyfriend says that, when you feel out of sorts, it is because "you have been left with nothing to do and left by yourself and with yourself for too long." I'll bet you a hundred dollars to a nickel that he is quite correct. Oooo, I think that fella has got a very wise noodle. There is really no contradiction between what each of you say. I would say you are both right.

Idleness is not your style. Some people think being able to vegetate is a great luxury. That's not how you sound. But you can't just continually be busy in an isolated way. Oh, you can do that, but I guarantee you that the long term effect of that is not healthy. It truly is sad that you routinely turn down the "invites." And a routine is what it has become. You get pushed out of your comfort zone when you socialize because - why? Sounds like a touch of social avoidance, and avoidance is basically anxiety driven. Unhealthy. And gets worse with age. (Believe me, I know.) Break that habit like you would smoking cigarettes or taking drugs addictively.

Anxiety can only be treated by controlled exposure to what makes you anxious. The exposure must not be overwhelming, but it will be a trifle uncomfortable and seem to not get you anything - at first.

It's not true that you are "not good" with interacting. You wouldn't even be getting those "invites," if you were a total stick-in-the-mud or seriously inappropriate with other people. You just lack confidence. You are afraid of two things. #1) You are afraid of feeling foolish by, maybe, saying the wrong thing or becoming boring. #2) You are afraid that, if you let these people into your life, they will want to hang around you more than you would like and, then, you might have to put up with that, or have to deal out some rejection to someone - so why get involved in the first place.

That is all theory, on my part. But, I would bet money on it. They are not good reasons to keep away from others. Any reason you have is not a good one, though deep down inside you really believe it is.

In the presence of other people, you will say the "wrong" thing from time to time, and you will become a little tedious to listen to now and then. That is true of every human being wandering around on planet Earth. Why should you be any different. You're not. No one is. Once I listened to a good tape by a motivational speaker called: "You Are Not Different!"

Also, if you let people more fully into your life, I guarantee you that they will become pains in the butt, at times. But, the alternative to putting up with that is WORSE. Unless, it is your calling to become a hermit, and that is true of a few, but not too many, people, you will see intoversion causing your problems to get worse over time, no matter how much Therapy, and no matter how much medication, you get. Except you won't know what is causing that deterioration. I know all this from having lived it and from having lived long enough to see what happens to other people over a long span of time when they routinely isolate.

Just some food for thought.