Thanks for posting your thoughts everyone. I don't really know what I'm trying to achieve by posting... and I don't expect anyone to be able to give me some perfect solution either.

I tried to go to community college for a while just because I did their little pre-test thing and I barely found out that I somehow qualified for an up to 2 year money grant thingy because I had good grades. I think I ended up going for 1 and a half, I had no idea what I was doing and I hated it.

After that I started working full time as a typesetter, and I think its the best I can do. To make things worse, to me the job is very hard and I can barely do it, but my supervisor for some reason just thinks I'm the best at it and she keeps wanting to push me to do better. But all I really want from there is to come in every day, do what I can, get paid, and go home. I don't want to be pushed or to get better and I don't even try to hide my depression there and things are just getting worse every day. I don't know how much longer I can take it.

I wouldn't mind seeing some kind of therapist but I don't really know how. I know its probably my next step but I guess I'm just afraid of it.