KK - I'm so sorry you had such a bad experience. Did the day program start today? Are you seeing a social worker or other therapist there? Perhaps you could prepare for that by making a list of your current issues. You'll only have a short visit with him/her so you'll want to make good use of your time. You'll want to just cry...but let's face it, you can do that at home!

You can tell him/her that your goal is to stay out of the hospital, but you will have to figure out how to do that SAFELY. Perhaps you can make a safety plan together?

You could also list all the things that happened to you in the hospital, and leave it with him/her to read later (on their time!) so they understand. Just try to make use of that time, and try to stay foused. It's hard. Sometimes you have to be your own advocate.

Also, you could try calling your local NAMI. Try looking at www.nami.org to see if there is a chapter in your area. You might find that they have people who understand and can listen for free!

Please take care of yourself. Emmy

"If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion." -- The Dalai Lama