chopin,ouch i bet that hurt.i know that you have said that you have issues with boundaries and that is something you both need to work on.it seems e-mails is a big boundary for her and you have kept on e-mailing her so maybe she feels like she needs to be a bit sterner to help get the message through.i don't know but maybe she feels if she lightens the message by saying i may not be a good idea,or something less stern may not get the message through.kind of a tough love thingdoes she allow phone calls.for specific reasons the only out of session contact i am allowed is calls. i know it is hard to talk on the phone sometimes but is this an option??

when my T finely said no e-mail and then also no written letters in the mail it had to be stern because i seemed to always think just this once should be OK.it wasn't in my best interest.anyway it stung and hurt and shook me up i described it as this
it was like a horse kept in a field surrounded by an electric fence,the horse is kept safe and allowed to go far and do as he pleases within these boundaries.but the horse isn't at first aware of the fence and the boundaries.until one day the horse gets to close and zap,confused hurt and not understanding . and this happens a few times until the horse understands these boundaries.and it hurt every time it was run up against.even though these were put to keep it safe it was hard to understand at first.kind of like the boundaries my T put on me.

sorry if i was so long winded and off base here just want to say i so know boundaries hurt but are necessary at times for the safety of both parties