I keep coming back to this thread.......... it's very close to home for me--- in regard to "mixed messages".

I'm so sorry Larry for all the confusion you went through as a child ......... and reading this: </font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
she never once comforted me. Not one hug, not ever, do I remember.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> I am right there too-- I believe my mother saw needing comfort as a weakness.

So confusing when our culture tells us "mothers" are safe, they cuddle, nurture and comfort---- when some had very much the opposite. Oh, once in a while I got a "nice" reaction... but that's only when HER conditions were met. To this day I struggle trying to guess what every single person's conditions are of me-- as I don't want to be rejected--- causing much anxiety----

Again, I'm sorry for what you went through and hope that little by little as you understand those "pieces", you are able to fit them into a new-healed YOU.