...today i put on some music that i like, and it was so good to listen and feel the emotions of the music that i like very much and all that.

but the urge to get drinkin' was so powerful. it's something i enjoy so much, listening to my favourite music and drinking and escaping in the sound and the feeling.

so powerful....overides everything....every point to me being sober.

i cannot listen to music often....it's been 10 weeks since i put on a tune!
it was real sad today to have to switch it off...knowing that i simply cannot control myself with that kind of energy going on.

i didn't drink, it actually seemed insane to choose not to considering the music and drinking option was clearly the more beautiful option....
Just not the practical one

i just know i will be a mess for weeks...do crazy stuff...regret everything about me...and may not even survive.
it's so hard being so intense and extreme.

monkey