Minds are tricky things, and memories are so slippery.
Between repressed and implanted memories, I am always left in doubt about whether certain things happened.

I really relate to parts of what you said: being an overly sexual child, I have memories of masturbation since age 6, watching porn at 8. And, most importantly, I remember having fantasies of rape at that age.
Where does that leave me? I'm uncertain whether something happened I can't remember or if nothing happened and I was just odd.

You, however, have the chance to access proof, no? Look for the court documents, it won't change what happened or didn't happen, but it might help you come to terms with it.