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Something that helped me might help others here. I feel sorry for how bad some members feel about themselves. Get the movie - MOONSTRUCK (1987,) staring Cher and Nicolas Cage. Cage's character gives a magnificent speech on how HUMANS ARE NOT MEANT TO BE PERFECT, but are meant to screw up and become heart-broken, and he tells Cher's character to just embrace that because THAT'S LIFE.
In this speech, he says that STARS ARE MEANT TO BE PERFECT . . . SNOWFLAKES ARE MEANT TO BE PERFECT . . . but people are meant by some grand Cosmic design to foul up and get into messes. He says he accepts that and he wants her to accept that and stop trying to be perfect. (She is in love with Cage's character, but engaged to someone else and is all torn up about what to do.)
What Nicolas Cage says and the way he says it - so compellingly - is one of the best things I've ever seen or heard in a movie. It changed how I look at myself, and I'm not that into movies. This was really special. I recommend it highly.
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