Thanks lee

Well i Finally got the guts to give her the letter, and then i went immediately to the gym to work out some of the stress. When i got home i was expecting the worse, but to my surprise, it didn't happen (i guess i must of given it to her at the right time, my dad wasn't home which helped and she wasnt in a bad mood). She was bit defensive about the relationship with my dad which is understandable, but she didn't yell at me and start an argument, which is what i was worried about. Because i just wanted to be honest with her not fight. She did say she was sorry, and i think she meant it. She looked really sad when i explained everything and how i felt. She admitted that she agreed that she was emotional abusive to my sister and i when i was younger, and that it was wrong. So i feel better, still struggling a little bit but better.
I told her about the emotional rollercoaster i've been on most of my life and how i felt it was getting worse. Probably because physically i've gotten really healthy and now my body has more time to focus on the emotions.I told her everything about how i get really upset over nothing that one day and the next day it doesnt bother me, and how sensitive to i am to things she says or does. How i get really hyper, angry and then have times where i'm depressed for days. The only thing i didnt tell her is that sometimes i think about suicide, i couldnt bring myself to do it, but i think she got the point that i am really unstable sometimes. She says shes noticed some things and is ow concerned about my mental well being (which i dont know, i dont want her to worry about me, i can handle it and i'll get help), my sister doesn't do this so she asked me to talk to the doctor about it when i see him next. So i guess we'll see, it makes me feel better that i did it and I'm glad i did it before i leave the house (1 week from monday), i didnt want to leave it all hanging over my head.