I believe I'm reading your story Barbara Freethy's, Just the Way You Are:

http://www.theromancereader.com/freethy-just.html

Maybe the two of you should read it together and discuss it? It's a quick, stupid, drug store romance novel read but the bones of the problem and solution are there. Reading it to her or the two of you together sharing it would certainly bring you together instead of having you on opposites sides of the problem?