Quote:
Originally Posted by babycds
For me, I have never tried to cover up the fact that I'm not normal and that there is something wrong with me. This helps and hurts me. It helps because then I don't have to worry about being someone I'm not and trying to get reality and falsehood mixed up, but it hurts a lot because then I constantly worry that no one will accept me and think I'm a retard (for lack of a better word, for I have been called that many a time) and then I freak out about being alone. I've always been open about talking to people about how I feel or what I am like and even though they act different around me, I realized that EVERYONE has something. Whether it is something big (like the girl I tutor, her name is Cassie and she had severe autism) or something small (like the star quarterback at my school who is afraid of heights.) It is coming to the realization that everyone is thinking the same way as you and I, and THEY are the people who think that WE are normal. So after this whole long and meaningless rant, to sum it up, every person on this planet is covering something up. And if we all just show it, we would all be that much more understanding and caring.
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That's true, my dear, but they are so busy condemning and criticizing the failure of others to be "normal" that they cannot be trusted with the truth. They'll just try to hurt you if they see your vulnerabilities. And so many people play the game of make-believe. Because of that, I have many masks and they are all well-used. My own face, on the other hand, must be protected at all costs. So I keep a buffer inside to separate what I think of as "real me" from "false me" so that I don't get too mixed up - as happened when I was younger.
Kudos to you for being that way.
It's great that you are honest and forthright about yourself, though. I wish I felt capable of doing that. I wish the world were a different place. I wish humanity would be different. But reality is always getting in the way.