Hi all,

I have been seeing a therapist for several months now. About every 2-3 sessions, I am simply shocked and appalled by her behavior.

For example, a few months ago, I found out one of my closest friends has terminal cancer. I obviously wanted to talk about this in therapy. She said, "unfortunately bad things happen. Why aren't we talking about your job?"

My job? I think it is more than understandable that I would want to talk about a dear friend dying! I was stymied! I could not believe she treated me with such an uncaring, cold attitude. I could not believe I was basically chastised for wanting to talk about a friend who is sick!

Then today when I first sat down, I wanted to catch my breath before we started the session. I said something about the weather, and she quickly informed me that "we aren't going to talk about things like the weather." What?! I can't remember the last time I saw a doctor, dentist, etc. - and the appointment did not start off with normal human graciousness and warmth. I tried to explain to her that it's really hard for me just to sit down and begin. I need to "warm up" a bit in therapy. She then said bascially that that is not how she operates. Wow. Isn't it her job to listen to what my needs are in therapy?

I then tried to talk about a very, very important issue at work, that could potentially have serious repurcussions for my career in the future. She again said "why are you taking up time talking about this? You could talk about this with a friend. Instead we should be talking about things directly related to your personality." It's my dime! My session! I feel if I think it's important enough to talk about, then maybe, just maybe she should listen! Since when does she get to control what I feel are my topics that need to be addressed?

She then almost punished me by saying that "None of my other patients talk about matters like this," as if to say, "your concerns are completely useless to me."

Also, in one instant I was crossing the room to get a piece of paper from her that she had written on for me. Right before I got to her seat, she dropped it on the floor in front of me. Again...I was shocked at this bad, unbelievable behavior.

I know two LCSWs personally, and they both said to run far away from this woman.

What a rude, intolerant "therapist," totally devoid of any warmth or compassion or caring. It should not surprise me, but in about 4 sessions, she has not once asked how my sick friend is doing. I feel she is lacking even the most basic of human kindnesses. It seems if I don't have interesting things that SHE wants to talk about, my issues are worthless to her. I don't know how much more damaging that can be to a patient.

Does anyone else think this borders on semi-abusive behavior? I really have had enough, and have tried to deal with her behavior, but I'm sick and tired of fighting to speak my mind - in therapy! I should not have to constantly "justify" what matters and topics I want to discuss!! Sometimes she's fine, but other times I am on the receiving end of this BS.

I am seriously thinking about emailing her a similar letter to the words I just wrote, and terminating my "relationship" with her.

Do you all also think she's...totally horrid? Do you think an email is a good idea, to just tell her what I think, and to terminate therapy? Or do I do so in person? I think an email would be a more realistic way for me to express my feelings.

Thank you!

MissRachel