For a while, this concept of 'tools' didn't somehow make a lot of sense to me; I couldn't seem to figure out what tools insight gave me.
I was having trouble thinking of just insight was supposed to lead to change. Shoot, I've been told often in my life how insightful/perceptive I am .... well, it sure didn't lead to a lot of change! Because the insight is one thing ..... knowing what to do with it is another. Or maybe it is that there is the insight into the nature of the problem ..... and then there is the insight into the nature of the solution. I had plenty of insight into the nature of my problems (yet not enough either) but very little insight into what a solution could be.
Just knowing how I reacted, say when my H got all critical, was one thing; understanding WHY I reacted that way, the history behind the coping mechanism was another thing; then learning about a different, better way to think about, react, respond to it was quite another; applying it, well.....that's been the hardest for me.....it's too easy to fall into old patterns, so it takes active, intense effort for me.
Actually, though, I think I am finally learning to reframe my thinking, recognize and reframe cognitive distortions ..... instead of only analyzing something about myself to death, looking at it from every angle so I can define it better, thinking about the problem only, I am figuring out how to think about the solution(s), too. And not just think about them, but get up and carry them out ..... keep being a thinker, but become more of a doer, too.
Anyway, now I understand better what tools actually are, in the coping skills sense, and I also have some better tools to use that I actually have an idea how to use (not that I won't accidentally hammer my thumb, so to speak, sometimes.....)