I know I also said to my 2nd T several times, how it would be nice if we either didn't need attachments or if the hurt/fear of having them could be totally removed ..... a detached sort of thing, no risk/no pain. She thinks the thing I really fear though is not so much the attachment itself, but the thought of facing the loss of it....or the loss of the person, by whatever means, death, rejection, etc ......
Vulnerability/trusting can be a scary risk ...... and when you've made that risk and been badly hurt, it can sure make you question why you'd want to take that risk again, or why you even feel the need of connection/attachment when there is the risk. I guess it might be easier to deny the need ...... but is that really going to make the need go away ...... there's also a great emotional/psychological risk in denying the need, trying to eliminate the desire for caring/connection, retreating from it. The need for connection is a very basic human thing, for the most part, so it's hard to actually remove ........ and, as I can tell you, it really is painful to even try; it's less painful to accept the need and learn healthy ways to seek it, have it, nourish it.
I do like what Perna suggested, about learning to care for yourself ...... that is really the way toward being able to have healthy connections with genuinely caring people. Learning to accept and love yourself is so key; it's like making a good connection with yourself. And when you love and accept yourself, you respect yourself, your needs, your desires ...... and you can be drawn to healthier people who know how to have healthier, caring connections....you deserve that! You deserve to give that gift to yourself, and you deserve to have healthy, healing connection. T really can help you with that ......