Hi guys, thanks for your responses. I do think that maybe she's not the smartest therapist I've ever had. I don't have a problem with that; what I have a problem with is her LYING TO ME and her inability to control the session.

Back to my story:

So she's looking shocked at my very detailed description of how my T acts (because who can make up that many details so quickly?) And she asks me if I ever "call him on it." And I look at her and say, "why in the world would I care that he's tapping his foot?!"

So we kind of moved on after that.

I don't know why, but for some reason she asked me how old my T was. I said, "23." (because he is.) And she flat out denied it. She goes, "No. That's impossible."

Maybe it shouldn't've irritated me as much as it did, but that got under my skin. Why would I lie about that? Just because MOST people can't get through school that fast doesn't mean that it couldn't be done. And I really like my T. I think he is fantastic. So I felt a little protective I guess. So I kind of got in her face and said, "Maybe he took a lot of AP classes in high school. Maybe he took classes every semester, I don't know. BUT HE IS TWENTY THREE."

So after that, we started talking about the rules of the DBT group. They're pretty standard: be respectful, no sexual relationships, etc. Then we get to the paperwork. She wants me to sign a release both giving her permission to share things with my main T and giving my T permission to share things with her.

I had already spoken with T about this, because, from her website, I had a pretty good idea that this was coming. I told T that I totally understood why she would want to be able to tell him things about me (in case I stormed out of group, suicidal, or something) but that I didn't feel comfortable giving her free reign to pick his brain about what I share with him in session. I explained to T that I had built up a relationship and trust with him over time and I didn't know group T at all, but I would be willing to revisit the topic in a month or two. T was completely supportive. He said that group T should not have a problem with that and it was whatever I was comfortable with.

Group T was not supportive. She made it sound like I would not be able to do group T unless I relented. I felt really backed into a corner and my lifeline was that T said she "should" be fine with it. I don't know what I would have done if I hadn't talked to him previously. I'd like to think I wouldn't've caved, but maybe I would've. She kept arguing her point, nodding her head, and saying "Okay?", making it really easy to say "yes", but I didn't. The more she pushed me the more I didn't want to acquiesce.
My final word on it was, "I'll talk to T about it." When she realized I wouldn't give her an answer, she said that we would just fill out the paperwork for her to talk to T and T to just listen. She wasn't happy about it.

I felt attacked. She said, "What's wrong? It's not like I'm not going to call him up and start trying to get all your information. I have too many of my own patients to worry about to have time for that."

I just kind of looked at her, shocked. Me signing a release to allow her to get T's info on me is a FAVOR. She doesn't just DESERVE that. I don't have to defend myself!

Then I signed the thing that said I would abide by the DBT group's rules. I commented on how many papers she was having me sign, and she said, "It's really important to [whatever the creator of DBT's name is] that you really commit yourself to the process. If [your T] is doing his job right, he'll have you sign something, too.

At this point I was completely on the defensive, so I just looked at her and made my eyes mean and said, "Why would you even imply that my T wasn't doing his job right?"

She actually stuttered. She said, "Well. you know... not all T's do...".

*****.

She also, when she was telling me about the group, told me about some annoying things that her other patients do, like telling her how much money they spend on marijuana and then tell her that they can't afford her fee. While I see how that could be really annoying, I don't see why on earth she would complain about one patient to another.

She then told me that "There was an african american girl in the group, and I hope that won't be a problem."

Um. What. The. ****. Lady? Do I LOOK like a racist? Do I just give off that KKK vibe? We hadn't said ONE WORD of ANYTHING that even began to HINT at ANYTHING racial. Why the **** would you say that??

I'm not even done, but I'm too angry to write more right now.