Hi All,
I am a very normal 20 year old kid who was popular and well liked and had good friends in high school. I have a great and loving family and my parents have never been divorced or anything like that. Honestly these last few sentences are factors that have made me feel kind of guilty for being sad and depressed like I am now, becuase unlike so many others, I really have had a very good and easy life and really have no bad or traumatic events to attribute what I am going through right now to. I feel bad that I am not currently taking advantage of the situation that I am in that so many others would kill to be in themselves, if that makes sense to any of you guys.

Anyways, after graduating high school and having probably the best summer of my life in which I did a euro trip with 4 of my best friends, I arrived in Oregon for my first quarter of college and almost instantly became much sadder and less social and sociable (first less sociable and then sort of to protect/not embarrass myself less social.) Part of this had to do with breaking up with my girlfriend who I had only been with for about 7 months but nonetheless got very attached to and still consider to be one of the most important people in my life. I struggled through the year, and was still able to get good grades and make a few very good friends who i still stay in touch with, but do feel like I kind of wasted a year of college that could have been soo much better.

Durring a particularly sad bu weirdly motivated stretch in the winter, I had decided I would get my **** together and send in some transfer applications. To make a long story short, I had a whole list but only ended up getting through one before I lost motivation. Luckily enough, I got into the one school in LA that I applied to and decided to go there. I had another great summer in which I impressed even myself in my ability to socialize and make anyone i wanted to laugh and have a good opinion of me. Then I carried this momentum into a great first semester and only durring the last month or so of Fall semester did I kind of sense another "depressive" episode looming.

Anyways, this semester has been rough. I joined a frat, which has been good and I know I would be having sooo much fun with if I was "good." This week was probably the hardest becuase after having a really relaxing spring break with a few of my good friends back home I was thrust back into my situation at school which I am less than happy with. I recently tried wellbutrin 150 mgs a day, but got a rash and also didnt really like it because it made me get way too drunk way too quickly (I usually drink around 3 or 4 times a week, sometimes in excess of 12 drinks. Unhealthy, I know, but truthfully I don't really see myself slowing down too much and in my mind legitamize this by the fact when I am "good" I drink just as much if not more than when I am "bad"; henceforth, alch is not the problem).

I really wana try to beat this with no medication, if possible.

Please, if you have any success stories(especially with college)/advice throw them my way. I could really use some positive feelings/stories right now to hopefully propell me back to my impressive and "good" self that I know I am capable of!

Thanks a ton