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Mar 23, 2012, 07:32 PM
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for (((Roadie))), sorry I deleted before...didn't mean to "mess" with you..I hope this post says the same thing...I just left out some of the actions which cause me to "hate" those I love at times.
"Hate" is a strong emotion. I do not waste my energy on "hating" etc, unless I also "love" someone or something very much.
In my life, I have had many loved ones run me over...my expectations of loved ones is very high...when this happens (yes, it still happens at this great age!), I feel hate...only for those ideas, those souls in my life that I love with equal intensity.
It is not worth my energy to "hate" something or someone who is unimportant to me. So I do not do it...even with those I love, I know how to avoid many crushing blows these days.
And, when I have "hated" those people, places, things. I loved...I did not hate THEM.
I "hated" their actions, not them...I hated because I have high expectations of that which I love unconditionally.......When my expectations are smashed, time and time again...I still love. I guess I'm nuts that way.
What people, the world Does does not define who, what they are...
When I truly love...it is always...amazingly, and I oftimes wonder if this is a blessing to be like this or a curse.
The world, people...my loves in my life repeatedly are as they are...few have changed during the course of my lifetime. I have changed. But that does not mean I can effect changes in others, or in the world...I Accept that...
Life is shades of grey.............once I came to terms with that, it was all easy.
I love. and, I sometimes hate what I love.
I am human...
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