Two days sober. What's helping me stay away from drugs the most right now is that I still feel sick from an overdose Tuesday evening. I smoked a little on Wednesday and Thursday, but I can't even bring myself to do that anymore. I'm tired of my mind being clouded and my body feeling sick. I went out to a bar with my friends tonight and they offered to buy me a drink and I couldn't take the offer. I absolutely have no desire for any sort of mind-altering substance right now. Just thinking about intoxication makes me want to vomit

Another thing that is helping is my roommate. I spilled my guts to her yesterday, told her about my problems, gave her all of my paraphernalia, and let her take care of the rest of my stash. She is so understanding, she just sat there and held me while I cried and blubbered. I'm thankful to have her in my life. I'm also attempting to regain sobriety because my grandmother's birthday was yesterday and talking to her on the phone made me realize how upset she would be if I had died the other night. It took everything I had to not break down and cry while on the phone with her.

I've tried cleaning up many times over the years. I'm serious this time around. I can't throw my life away with chemicals.