And yes they do plead, and sadly, no they don't get it. I went through that at Christmas and it completely disabled me. And I really wish I could muster it somehow because my mother is too old to understand it and that really makes it so very crippling to me because we were always buds and spent years together working in my business and talking about how nice it was to laugh and be ourselves without anyone telling us we couldn't.

But I cannot be around my older sister at all now, all I do is have awful flashbacks and I hate what I see in them, wish I didn't have them to be honest. And my sister insists on being the know it all, doesn't get PTSD and just wants to call me crazy. But, sigh that is how she is, she knows it all, and I call her Doctor Who. The only thing she is interested in is CONTROL. And how about that famous line they all have, "I am the one that has to have all the answers and take charge all the time" Oh yeah, the price one pays for insisting THEY be in control. Sadly, they don't even see it.

And Yes, I can relate in wanting to love them somehow, I really can, but sadly it is just too hard to be aorund them. I used to be able to do it, but I cannot do it anymore as I said, and I feel incredibly guilty or weak somehow that I can't, but it just is much too crippling for me now. It makes me ill just thinking about it to be honest.

Open Eyes