Thanks Heidu, I don't know if HE knows how he feels on commitment and such. I think we both could use counseling, definitely - when we first met, he told me he loved me VERY quickly (like two weeks after we started seeing each other, probably even earlier) and not long after told me that I was the first woman he ever thought he could marry. But now he isn't sure if he wants to be married, but I believe personally that this whole type of thing could happen again (fall for a woman quickly, eventually not "spark" with her) and then want to split up. I want him to work it out with me and not go on and have a pattern like this. He has lamented how most women considered him a friend, not someone to date - and here he has a woman who wants to be with him.

Last night we went out to get some dinner, and spent the evening holding hands, giving neck rubs, etc. and with his arm around me while watching TV. He hugged me when he got home, he always smacks me on the butt, and I just don't understand how someone can just think of someone as a friend and do that. I do know that a couple of times in the past (not a lot, but twice that I know of) he had a sexual relationship (not all the way with either woman) that he only considered friends. I don't personally consider that just friends. And with me, there is a lot more there - as far as frienship, affections, etc. If something is 90% good, and there are more pluses in being together than a apart, then I don't understand why he won't go to counseling. I feel like there is this key that I don't have that would unlock something inside of him to do that - and I just don't know what it is. There are things he keeps inside, I know he's been hurt a lot before and he is extraordinarily stubborn. I don't think he likes too much to be accountable to someone (though for someone who considers himself independent, he has taken really well to domesticity). But I wish he'd really focus on me - on what we have, which is a lot.