Are you using your college disability access resources and getting your meds adjusted by your pdoc. I went through a really difficult time with my BP while I was in college this year. It lasted for six months. I had to drop a class and get extra time on assignments. I also spent a week in the hospital. I didn't have to drop out though. I made it through fall and winter quarter even though I spent a lot of time in bed. I brought my books to the hospital and was able to study part of the time I was there. I was a complete mess. I have a great T and pdoc. They helped me get through it. I tried to hang myself at one point. I hope you have a lot of support. Having support was essential to my recovery. The college I go to is really supportive, the faculty is supportive and I have a couple of friends that are supportive. I always try to remember that there is something I can do even when I am overwhelmed by the disabling emotions and impulses of this illness. This carries me through the storm. Last year I spent three weeks in the hospital and I had to drop all my classes. I bounced back and jumped back in. Now I am a senior. I hope you don't give up. It's hard sometimes but it can be done and it is so rewarding. There are so many success stories out their. I think of it as an adventure. My own mind is my adventure. I don't have to travel to Tibet or Peru. I can have an adventure any time!