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Jazzy to clarify is this about you using sex as a method of control over another person? If so I would think it's about getting control where you once didn't have any? Not sure if I'm 'getting it' correct. If this is about control have you figured out in specifics why you have a need for control in this way?
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"Be careful how you speak to your children. One day it will become their inner voice." - Peggy O'Mara
Don't ever mistake
MY SILENCE for ignorance,
MY CALMNESS for acceptance,
MY KINDNESS for weakness.
- unknown
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