I used to think that getting past my depression would solve my problems. When I started on anti-depressants and immediately felt wonderful, it was like a dream come true. I felt on top of the world: like I could do anything be anything. I started many things and had brilliant plans. In retrospect I was clearly hypomanic. I can see now that I had been so in the past, but the AD left me in the longest episode I'd ever had. It also triggered rapid cycling especially as we increased the dose. I got to the point where I cycled every few days. I eventually ended up with a bipolar dx and a while after that with a mood stabilizer that works pretty good. Except now, with the stability, I don't know what to do with myself. Actually I guess I just don't know how to do it. I have isolated so long I'm afraid to go out in the world. I do have friends, but I don't go out with them much. I know all the things I should do to deal with my illness and I rarely do. I also have psychological issues unrelated to the bipolar (though they may have triggered or worsen it significantly) and although I know I could be helped my talking to my T, I can't make myself do so. That seems to be the story right now. I what to do with my life, what I want to do with my life, and other than one or two areas I haven't. It's just so frustrating.