Quote:
Originally Posted by sidestepper
I still have self-esteem issues, like others here my T finds it exasperating that I will not accept compliments ..... So I guess my major technique is self talk to myself that other people are really too busy living their lives to care what I look like or do/not do.
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(((Sidestepper)))
You mentioned that you have a difficult time emotionally accepting compliments ~ unsure if the cause is your fear of not being worth it, or because it frightens you to feel beholden to someone.
That's a really good point, imo. I'm now 41 y.o., and have been in many romantic relationships which all follow a pattern. I cannot completely open up and trust him. Some men have tried to go farther than others, but they always reach walls.
Thankfully, my T has accepted my feelings of self-hate and inability to accept compliments. He doesn't agree with my feelings. He likes to point out good things that I do...therefore, I can't be entirely "evil". But, it's a struggle.
I do agree with your recommended technique in general. For the most part, people are too busy wrapped up in their own little worlds to bother analyzing and critiquing us for what we do/don't do. There are always exceptions to the general rule.
Thank you for sharing your opinions and experience!
