I think that if doing these things makes you feel better about yourself and more confident, then go for it! Not shallow at all.

With my T, I feel grateful he doesn't seem to care how I look. I don't take a lot of care with my appearance and I'm glad that doesn't matter to him. I've encountered some people who are judgmental about appearance and may think ill of me because I'm not into fashion and make-up. But my T is just a casual guy and very accepting. Just one less thing to have to worry about--how I look--for therapy.