I think I replied and told her pretty much what you just said, spiritrunner. That I needed to heal and the way to do that was to not have contact. I'm not even sure what I wrote to her, honestly, and I am afraid to go into my texts and check right now because I don't want to feel the hurt that seeing her number and her words again will bring up.

Thank you for being understanding. I have been sort of hard on myself lately because I have been noticing how much I avoid feeling things about ex-T, and I know that avoiding feelings isn't healthy for me. But it does make me feel better to know that you are coping in some of the same ways, and it makes it a little easier for me to convince my inner critic that there isn't a WRONG way to do this, the point is just to get through it.

I do try to look at the big picture: it hurts less now than it did 2 months ago, and much less than it did 5 months ago. That is progress, and it tells me that in another 2 or 5 months it will hurt that much less. I have to believe that. My dream is to someday have an entire day go by without thinking of her, so that when I DO think of her I will have that moment of "hey! I didn't think of ex-T at all yesterday!"