So Ive struggled with the urges off and on for a year now-was 4 yrs free of cutting. never gave in all these last times....then i screw up. wednesday i was just so bah! so bah! i went into the bathroom at work and tried to scratch with a tac but it wasnt enough so i went after work and bought shaving razors. I had to do it right after I got home. four years and i did it. the thing is even though i only use shavers, one time isnt enough. i have to do it like 3-4 times and even though theyre just surface cuts and not deep at all, i am making 3 red lines at a time. so i have 21 lines on me from just 3 days. i felt like in the shower just doing it. i just feel better since ive done it because im not struggling with wanting to do it now.

geesh.