Kacey, I must say, therapists seem to work really hard to get us to trust them, then once we get attached to them, do things to push us away. I haven't figured that one out yet.

Please cut back on the sleeping pills. I worry for your safety.

Regarding your thought: thoughts are thoughts and feelings are feelings. Both can lie. Neither should be ignored nor placed in charge. You had a thought and it brought up feelings. You can look at the feelings, decide if it means anything to you and go from there.

Big hugs to you, Kacey.