((((unhappyguy)))),

Glad to hear you got through the night last night. Oh, I can so relate to wondering if you are not up to working anymore. I quietly think that to myself alot. I also felt the same way about the anti anxiety meds too. Right now I don't take any and can't say it is easier either. But what I am working on is how my own thinking gets in my way.

unhappyguy, you are a very kind hearted person and you really have to remember to be kind hearted to yourself. Honestly?, I have to work overtime sometimes to not allow the negetive people from my past to continue to invade my thoughts and that is hard. I was so unaware of how much I was effected by that. Wow it is a lot of work to find a way to overcome that. But I really try very hard to continue to give myself permission to do that. You have to keep giving yourself permission to keep trying no matter what, and believe me I know how hard that is somedays, and exhausting too.

I noticed when you help others and give advice, you DO have some good skills there.
I do that a lot because it allows me to remember that I do know more than I give myself credit for. Sure, I could spend a lot more time complaining or poor meing,and some of that is ok, we do need to do that, but you have to also work on problem solving skills, and I know you have them.

Keep trying not to think ahead so much, that can easily happen with PTSD because there is some real hypervigillance there. Keep focusing on each day, one day at a time and do your best not to ask questions like "what if I fail somehow?". Remember that when you do that it is the PTSD that is coming out and so you are going to have to not give in to that. Somedays you are going to do better than other days, That is ok, know that you have good days and try to let those add up.

((((Hugs))))
Open Eyes