I knew that it would be a month before I'd see my T (which IS a long time!), but I figured that I could call him if things ever got really intense. Just days after I saw him last, I let my bf and some ladies here know about an intimate issue that's been following me for almost 30 years!

The reaction of everyone who has responded makes me feel a little better about myself towards the incident. I have been carrying deep shame and self-hate inside for SO long! I am now really anxious to finally tell my T about the incident, to hopefully make me feel better. Another part of me knows that there are other things that I haven't shared ~ and I'm still scared.

I just feel these intense emotions and I'm not sure that I can wait. Who's to say that my dark side won't take over before my T returns? You know what I mean??