Glad you found it useful (if not a tad too long), and hope that it has strengthened your resolve to hang on in there.

I know what you're talking about with the phrase "depression think". I used to call it "being on the negative thought train and not being able to get off". One negative thought would give birth to another negative thought, and this just went on all day. It was like a thinking disease, I could see the positive in nothing, and thought that people who viewed the glass as half full as opposed to half empty were naive and foolish.

I read that book "The power of positive thinking", but didn't get much out of it. In the end I just had to accept the fact that I couldn't completely stop having negative thoughts (in fact some were justified), but to learn to recognise them as just thoughts being produced by a neurochemically imbalanced brain, and not necessarily an accurate reflection of reality.

I also learned that instead of actively coercing yourself to think positively, sometimes it's better to just attempt to stop thinking negatively by dropping every thought (negative or otherwise) as soon as you give birth to it and it enters consciousness.

My thought processes used to get me into a lot of trouble, and learning to just stop thinking was a real challenge, but ultimately a real liberation.