There is something I find curious. My T has told me she can’t be my mother in the therapy process. However, when I described what she is doing with me in therapy, my H and a couple of friends have opined that she is being just like a mother. She is saying “no” to me. She is trying to teach me how and why to have boundaries. She wants me to be independent. She wants me to know I’m a worthy person.

I see the truth in the analogy. The way I’ve been reacting is like a 3-year-old. Think about this:

Me: I want you to be my friend.
T: I can’t do that because it is not in your best interests.
Me: *Throws self on floor and has a tantrum.*
T: I only want what’s best for you.
Me: I want to be held.
T: I don’t want to because it makes me uncomfortable.
Me: *Starts whining*
T: But I will hug you. *Demonstrates*
Me: I want to email you whenever I want and I want you to reply.
T: No, I won’t do that because that will make you dependent on me and I have a right to have a life outside my work.
Me: *Screams bloody murder.*
T: You need to read and study this book. It will teach you about boundaries.
Me: Okay. *Reads book and starts to understand*
T: I’m happy for you. You’re doing a good job. Keep going. You’ll get there.
Me: I will get there.

I mean really; how much healthy parenting is that? I'm starting to see the growth (maybe I'm up to age 4 now).

I'm bringing this up to T tomorrow. I can't wait to hear what she has to say whether she agrees or disagrees.