I broke it off. Then we talked. I made him cry. I told him all the ways he has hurt me. He says he doesn't know why he does it. He says he's going to therapy. Apparently I suck at breaking it off. But I don't know how to forgive him. I prefer he hit me or try to kill me again...he tried to kill me you guys. We had a rational conversation about how he decided I was the root of all his problems and how he didn't see any other alternative than to get rid of me. How can I love someone that wanted me dead so much they actually tried to kill me. That they actually thought about hiding my body? But if it gets physical again he knows I will leave. But when it's physical of course it's wrong. I wish he would just hit me again so I would know its ok to leave. And just hearing myself type this out I realize how of course it's ok...it's just what if he comes around again and is the amazing man I fell in love with? Then I'll be stuck with someone I resent. I should have left a long time ago. I am afraid. I didn't because I thought it was my fault. Sounds ridiculous. Sometimes I wish he had just finished the job and killed me.