I think the cutting thoughts are only there because you are having such a hard time right now. I know they seem to surface for me when I'm struggling with something.

I'm sorry about the fighting with your boyfriend, too. I know sometimes couples fight and may not even realize why or how often. Talking things out and expressing your feelings assertively is the best way to go.

I'm one of the many who feel awful when they eat, too. It's not an emotional thing, just a physical one. Like I'll eat a little bit and it's like my body rejects it and I feel so sick...even if I'm really hungry.

Please try to hang in there.