Quote:
Originally Posted by essexgirl
Hello i'm having a bad day today. I was in hospital
yesterday as i have laser treatment every 6 weeks for a
birthmark on my right cheek of my face.
I have very low confidence and self-esteem about the way i look.
I am a size 14-16 and feel too overweight and have joined a slimming
club with my best friend but find it hard to stick to the foods they state as i love chocolate so much. 
Basically i think i am ugly as i worry that my bra size 36b is too small
and also that i cannot look in mirror as i feel despicable. I worry mostly that
people outside think this. I'm a young girl from London who is very conscious
of the way i look and worried as well too that i look old etc but if you can let
me know your opinions i would be grateful. Thanks. xxx
http://s1182.photobucket.com/albums/...elk01/randomz/ |
Hi Essex, you are lovely. But more importantly, I would rather address the inside of you (and how you feel about yourself) rather than the outside
If you feel depressed about your appearance or are struggling I suspect there is a reason and it's not just random. It's worth giving a go to talk about things with a T, cuz even though you might not feel like it, you are unique and special and lovely, intelligent and have a lot to offer. That is the most important part. Because when you feel that way, you project that beauty and you glow from within
I am probably not telling you anything you don't already know, but...I wish someone would have taken the time to tell me this when I was your age
instead of having to find out the hard way 20 years later...and I live in a brutal town working in what can be a brutal industry.
What the media and society tells us is "beautiful" or even "passing" is generally just a trend made up from advertisers, analysts, fashion "gurus", etc. The images that are projected onto us on the runway (that is simply ART, by the way) and in the media is marketing and photo-shopping and a stylist and a lot of make up or surgery, hurting your body by dieting to nothing, etc.
And the indoctrination starts really young ... as young men and especially young women, we are inundated with so many images of what is considered acceptable, beautiful, lovely, real, socially proper - and we are young and don't know ourselves yet - so we may put a lot of credibility into those marketing messages ("brainwashing techniques").
The most important thing is to focus on the things about you that you feel you are good at, that you like about yourself, qualities that you find interesting or unique about yourself, and then run with it! Have a blast. Focus on yourself. I think it's fabulous if you would like to change your appearance or weight or size because
you will feel better - but Essex do it for you. Not for anyone else.
Try to focus simply on YOU and not what the outside world is throwing at you. If you want to make a statement, impress someone, stand out, etc, figure out why...
...that said, I admire you for reaching out! And I hope you'll come back and let us know how you are doing!
You are lovely and amazing.