Quote:
Originally Posted by mixedup_emotions
I am hopeful that this will be a great learning opportunity, as awful as it feels....
** MAY TRIGGER **
Here's what comes to mind when I'm going through this...Say, a group of friends are getting massages and you joined them. Everyone strips down into their birthday suits - except you. You are wayyy too self-conscious to get THAT undressed. Everyone is getting mad because you're not participating.
You're thinking, "But wait, don't I have a right to set a boundary, to have limits? Can't I get a massage with my clothes on? Should that affect our relationship so drastically?"
But they're saying, "You came to a nude massage parlor, what do you expect?"
So, I see their point....leading me think that maybe I don't belong there anymore.
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I see their point as well, BUT I also see yours MUE- why can't they? So what if you're not chiming in with your thoughts in group right now? What's the big deal? DO you have to behave as they do? (OK- here it comes..... tell me if this sounds familiar.) If they (as a group) choose to jump off a bridge do you have to follow them? Or do you have the right to withhold participating in that particular event because you feel it might endanger you somehow? So what if they don't like that you're not talking or reacting the way they want you to?
If this is what group T is all about, then I don't ever want to be in group T.
My vote goes to you Mue. You do what's best for you- and don't worry about the group in this situation.