Lost- my heart just goes out to you. I understand the feelings you are having based on what you said and emailed. T understands them too. He knows that this is a pattern for you and his saying "I want you to anaswer that question, you should already know the answer." is his way of helping you realize and verbalize what he has said to you concerning this matter in the past. My T will do this to me as well by saying something to me and then saying, "Now, tell me what you just heard me say." She wants me to say it outloud so that 1) I understood exactly what she was saying and if I didn't, she can correct me and 2) That it will register in my head in another way by me vocalizing out loud what she wants me to internalize.

Don't feel bad about emailing T. That is going to happen- and he knows it's going to happen. It's how you process what happens in therapy.