Okay, farmergirl, spill; what bloody book?

I saw my T and then we terminated and then I saw her again many years later and I was struck with deja vu on how we almost immediately got into the exact same arguments/corners. The second time though her response was different (surprised heck out of me; obviously we had both changed, not just me) and we didn't stay stuck. I did the "I don't know" for awhile but eventually we made a compact that that was outlawed and I wasn't to say it anymore but take the time to "find" the answer.